XOXO, Kindle Girl

Spotted: a book review that’s dripping with drama and just a touch of shade. All the Colors of the Dark by Chris Whitaker is serving up a major vibe—but not the vibe I necessarily devour on a normal day. Think high-brow literary realness with a side of twists and suspense that’ll keep you perched on the edge of your poetic pedestal. This tome is a marathon, not a sprint, blending a gorgeously written coming-of-age tale with a mystery-thriller edge that’s got all the brainy book babes buzzing. And, trust, I see why they’re obsessed—those chapter builds and cliffhangers? Chef’s kiss.

But here’s the tea: somewhere in the middle, it starts to feel like a never-ending afterparty—fab at first, but then it just drags. I’m all about a saga that spans a lifetime (give me that full-circle POV), but if they’d chopped 200 pages, I’d be the first to cheer. The writing’s flowery enough to make you feel like you can brag that you read it, but you have to dedicate some serious time to it. I enjoyed the book and can respect it for what it is – but if you’re the type who needs the story to move faster than a cab down Fifth Avenue, this might not be your vibe. 🙋🏻‍♀️

BUT, can we talk about that title? Outstandingly perfect—like, I’ve never seen a book nail its name this hard. No spoilers here, but if you’re dying to dish, slide into my DMs or email me.

XOXO, Kindle Girl.

Ideal For: the thoughtful, patient readers who enjoy literary depth, emotional complexity, and a mix of suspense and heart, and enjoy darker, more introspective stories.

Vibes: nostalgic and melancholic, mysterious and heavy, eventually redemptive

Spice: 🫑  (no explicit scenes but somewhat graphic)

Book Parents: Demon Copperhead and To Kill a Mockingbird?!

Tropes and Elements: kidnapping, unreliable-ish narrator, slow-burn mystery, small town secrets, redemptive quest, dual timelines

Series: none

Formats: Hardback, paperback, ebook, audiobook

Summary: Upper East Siders—or should I say, small-town Missouri misfits? Here’s the tea on All the Colors of the Dark by Chris Whitaker, served up with a Gossip Girl twist. Picture this: it’s 1975, and our little rebel, Patch, is about to stumble into the scandal of the decade. Spotted: a kidnapping in the woods, with Patch playing the unlikely knight to a damsel named Misty. But this isn’t your typical fairy tale—think more Chuck Bass brooding meets Serena’s wild streak, wrapped in a mystery that spans decades.

Patch, our scrappy hero with a heart of gold and a rap sheet to match, gets tangled up with the wrong crowd when he tries to save Misty from her abductor. Cue the dramatic fallout: he’s whisked away, she’s left with secrets, and the whole town’s whispering behind their diner menus.

Fast forward, and Patch is all grown up—think Dan Humphrey after too many late nights, haunted by guilt and chasing ghosts. His best friend Saint? Loyal to a fault, trying to keep their friendship intact while Patch spirals.

The years flip like pages in a scandalous diary: 1975, 1996, and beyond. Patch and Misty’s trauma-bond is the kind of forbidden connection that keeps you hooked—will they reunite, or will the past bury them? Throw in a cast of small-town oddballs, a sheriff that makes you think, and enough emotional baggage to drag you down with it. It’s a slow burn with prose so lush you’ll want to frame it, and a mystery that eventually unravels with only a few (read, several) inconsistencies.

Will they find the culprit? Will anyone make it out alive with their sanity? That’s one secret I’ll never tell.

xoxo, Kindle Girl